I had an appointment Thursday with my plastic surgeon. Basically when I lose the last 17 pounds I have left, I can call and make an appointment to go back in. I had wanted to lose 20 lbs by Thanksgiving, but Dr Martell made an excellent point. When I lose the last bit of this weight to have my surgery done, when I lose more weight afterwards (which I plan to) he said my breasts would likely sag again a little bit. So my new goal is to lose 40 more pounds by the New Year. If I can do that, I will be about 10-15 lbs from my personal goal weight. I'm torn. I want this reduction now because my back is killing me every single day and with the slightest amount of activity, but at the same time, I don't want to go through this and then have them start sagging even a tiny bit because I lost more weight. I'm so undecided.
I also had an appointment for a physical therapy consult on Thursday. She showed me some exercises that I can do that will not hurt my back and she also gave me resistance bands to use too.
I feel undefeated and kind of unsupported. I just want to be normal and happy in a physical sense. I don't want to feel like a 65 year old, I want to feel like a 25 year old.
This is making me feel so alone. I have so much anxiety and stress from the thoughts running through my head and everything else going on. I don't want to feel like everything and everyone is working against me. I've come so far already in this journey and part of me feels like it's been for nothing.